It's in the blood! [on being hot and rich]

Went out today with Creamer and watched the Twilight Saga, Eclipse.  Teee heee! XD.  I haven't read the novel (never will), so as expected, I bugged creamer with many questions while we were watching the picture (thank you so much Creamer for the patience. XD)  We also watched the New Moon when it was shown last year, but, honestly, I don't remember much about the movie.

I'm not going to write a review about Eclipse.  Pfft, many already did and I don't want to add up to it.  I liked the movie, but it's not really the best.  Disney-Pixar's animated movie, UP, still tops my chart.  [Errr, what's the connection?].  Quite a few quotable quotes, but the one I remember the most is, "I am hotter than you.", Jacob to Edward.  Haha, o sige ikaw na hotter!  He actually meant warmer, as in body temperature, not the other hotter that you have in mind now. 

Nasa dugo lang yan! (It's in the blood!)

Was watching TV Patrol earlier and one of the news was the recent list of Forbes Asia's Richest Men in the Philippines.  Henry Sy, still, is the richest with an estimated net worth of $5 US Billion (woooohoooooo!!!), followed by Lucio Tan with $2.1 US Billion, and John Gokongwei Jr. with $1.5 US Billion.  Geez....What are they going to do with that money?  Today's exchange rate: 1 U.S. dollar = 46.4900046 Philippine pesos.  If we do the math, $5 US Billion is equivalent to Php232.45 Billion.  Imagine that!  If I were Henry Sy, and let's say, if I were to live another 100 yrs, (given that each yr has 365.25days, and assuming that the exchange rate remains the same in the next 100yrs), I could spend up to 6,364,309.00Php each day!  That's spending around 265,179.54Php every hour in 100 years!  The total population of the Philippines is estimated at 94,013,200 million according to National Statistics Office.  With this data, Henry Sy can give Filipinos 2,450.00 Php each and still live with Php2.1 Billion.  Holy flying cow! 

That was just here in the Philippines.  Just imagine if we talk about the richest man in the world.

In my current financial and economic status, I effing envy Henry Sy! @_@

We have a copy, at home, of Entrepreneur Philippines' "Success Secrets of the Country's 50 Top Entrepreneurs".  Of course Henry Sy is in the book and I learned a few facts about him.  Chinese immigrant Henry Sy came to Manila from China (where else) before the second World War.  He was only 12, and his family had no money when they migrated  He only started attending formal school when they got here.  Yep, he was already 12 when he started Grade one.  He entered college at age 26, but because of his booming buy and sell business at that time (selling shoes, I believe), he had to quit college after two years, and concentrate on his business.  Now, he's (dyaran!) the Asia's shopping mall king, and one of the planet's wealthiest people. That's a real rugs-to-riches story.  And more than 40 years after he quit college, De La Salle University conferred on him an honorary doctorate in business management in 1999.  He was already the shopping mall king before he got his doctorate.  You see, not having a formal college education is never a hindrance to become financially successful.  (So yeah, quit school jerks!  Stop wasting your time!  Diploma is just a fucking piece of recycled paper that doesn't really hold a meaning! - ok, now this is just a joke.  A college degree is always a plus).  Success came to Sy only as a result of hardwork, and errr....I do not know. @_@

Here's a Golden Rule according to Henry Sy: 

There is no such thing as overnight success or easy money.  If you fail, do not be discouraged; try again.  When you do well, do not change your ways.  Success is not just good luck; it is a combination of hard work, good credit standing, opportunity, readiness and timing.  Success will not last if you do not take care of it.

-Entrepreneur Philippines' "Success Secrets of the Country's 50 Top Entrepreneurs".

Henry Sy (ID photo, hehe)

I'm feeling inspired now.  Teee heee! XD  But wait, how come the richest men in the Philippines are Chinese (Sy, Tan, Gokongwei,)?  What happened to the many intelligent and hard working Filipinos their age? @_@

Siguro nasa dugo lang talaga.  (Maybe it's in the blood.)

Well, I'm going to bed now and dream of sleeping in bed of billions of dollars with Ashley Greene (Alice in the twilight saga, just so you know) in my arms. Teee heee! XD

Sabado, July 03, 2010 ()

Left home at quarter to 5 for my morning walk, and decided to take my jogging-route the other way around.  From home, I walked down the road to RITM - only to find out that their gate doesn't open till 6am.  Arrggh. Hence, I went back and took the original route. Its just the same distance anyway.  It's not their main gate that connects RITM to our village, just so you know.  It's just a small gate at the rear part of RITM, only passable for humans (and acting-humans).  I believe RITM is paying some amount to our Home Owner's Association so their employees and patients (usually suspected SARS, aH1N1 and other viral and diabolically-threatening-disease carriers) can pass through our Village.  Why am I telling you these?  Errr...sorry, just lack of interesting info to share.

Wait, where's my "Congratulations-You-Posted-4-Entries-in-Just-One-Week" banner shitnitz here? Haha.... I really don't have much to talk about at this early morning, but I got nothing better to do so I might as well type something.

I don't feel like blathering today.  Here are some photos instead, which were taken earlier this morning during my walk-slash-jogging.

• South Super Highway, a few minutes before 5am.  Crossing the bridge over SLEX, going to Bayanan.

• Filinvest Corp City now.  I just passed the Asian Hospital and the creepy abandoned building.  (Why did I not take a photo of the Asian Hospital?)

• Signage already says where this road is going, duh.  Where else....

• To the jungle ..... at 5:27am.  Weather was perfect!

• Some flower-bearing tree along the road.

• A building in the middle of the jungle?  Hmmmkei, it's not some building.  It's RITM.

• Sunrise at 5:48am.  It was supposed to be bright and beautiful, but the true colors didn't show.  Arrgh.  The photo appeared darker because of the sun's reflection.  This photo was taken using my 3yo N73 phone, not some expensive dlsr, hmmmkei?!  My phone's camera can adjust to the ambient light source, but duh, I'm jogging... I don't have the time to reduce the exposure setting.  Point and shoot.

• The Palms Country Club a hundred or so meters away.  (I've been here twice during CVG-Alabang's Christmas party, 2007 and 2008)

• Do I need to tell more?

• Finally, home!  Hahaha...ok, this is not ours.  Teee heee! XD  This is just some house I passed by while walking back home.  I thought it deserves a picture.  I'm going to rob this house build myself a house like this someday.  Teee heee! XD

Gawd....I'm tired.  Expect more pics in the future.  Ok, I'll bring a real camera next time. XD  Meme taym. Z.

WELCOME TO THE JUNGLE

Been doing some jogging-slash-walking for two weeks now; 2 hours everyday. Ok, I admit, it's not really everyday, but every other day.  But I'm getting there.  Used to do it every day last year till I became totally lazy and stopped hitting the pavement.  And so, I must call this my-second-attempt-to-achieving-fitness.  Teee heee! XD.  Mind, I don't plan to be slim or have a well-defined abs like those gayish-models, of Bench underwear, that every woman swoon over.  Arrggh, for chirsake!  I just want to be healthy and lose weight. That's just it.

I started taking a new route in my jogging last week. I used to just jog-slash-walk around Camella and Pleasant Village, maybe less than half-a-mile walk, then head back home. But now, from home, I walk down to Pleasant Village to Bayanan, and walk the National road to Festival mall (stop over at 7-11 at Festival to get something to drink), and walk around the Filinvest Corp City to The Palms, till I reach RITM (Research Institute for Tropical Medicine), and do some more walking-slash-jogging around the area before going home. I walk no less than 2 miles each day!

Ah-huh! XD

The only hard part of what I'm doing is waking up - which is a real drag. Ugh. While I was jogging the other day, I found a few interesting things which I was able to take a few shots of, with the help of my 3yo N73's 3.2MP camera.

Here they are...

PICTURE1:

Above is a picture of an old (and very creepy) abandoned building located at the back of Festival Mall in Alabang.  It's just across Ospital ng Muntinlupa, which is a hundred and some meters away from The Asian Hospital.  I've been around Alabang all my life, but that was the first time I saw this building.  What makes it even creepier, aside from the broken glass windows and the peeling paint on its walls,  is the statue of a woman in front of the building; which appears to me like a naked, virgin, young woman bound and restricted at a pole affixed to a stone image of what seems to be the devil's skull.  Its face has an unfinished hasty look, although its breasts and vulva and body were curved with elaborate care.  I was imagining the virgin was stabbed a few times to bleed, and the blood rushed from its flesh down to the bottom of the devil's skull where her blood was collected as a sacrifice and offering to the gods of the underworld . After an ample amount of blood was collected, the virgin was put down to the ground; and was further abused like a sex doll bathing in its own blood, fucked in its cunt and mouth and ass...all at once...and finally, killed by slitting its throat slowly with a knife made of stone, till the head fell off from its body, and blah blah blah... Ok, I'll stop here. My imagination is gross, sorry.   If you know what this building is, please let me know. XD

PICTURE 2:

This is a mini waterfall I discovered near RITM (Research Institute for Tropical Medicine).  The Road to RITM, from The Palms, is like a mini-jungle, except for the asphalt road.  Speaking of of the jungle...

PICTURE 3:

Next picture is a dead snake, which I suspect as a young reticulated python.  It's not small.  Its body is thicker than my chubby thumb, and estimating its length, it's probably more or less 2-foot long.   I wonder what happened to it. 

PICTURE 4:

And here's another picture of a dead creature from the mini-jungle of Alabang.  I'm sorry about the quality of the photos, mind, I am using a cellphone-camera.  Its color almost blend with the asphalt, but try to look at it closely and you'll realize it's a dead turtle.  Looks like it got run over by a car.  Poor turtle.  It looks small in this photo, but it's shell is actually bigger than the size of my palm.  If I will include its protruding head to its lenght, it is probably 7in long.

I also wanted to take some photos of the dead frogs on the road (frogs....they're many!), but I assume you wouldn't want to see them.  Tomorrow is another jogging-slash-walking day for me..  Who knows, I might find a tiger, or maybe a lion, this time.   I just hope it's a dead one.  XD

A SHORT STORY

Once upon a time, a strangely hungry family went out to celebrate the mother's birthday. They sure ate a lot....

But the mother was not satisfied...

and so were her children....

so the brilliant man of the family thought of something.... (dyaran!!!)

He bought a big bowl of Halo-halo. "Dessert for everyone!", he said.

But ended up consuming it by himself.

Tsk tsk tsk... THE END.

Wait!!! That's not how the story ended! The brilliant man didn't eat the gigantic serving of halo-halo alone for chrisake! He ate just half of it. Teeee heee! XD

Went out with my family (minus one - the eldest left early for work, and a soul - Dad, who prolly was with us for all we know ) this afternoon to celebrate our mom's birthday. Just a simple celebration, as usual. This year, we went to Max's at Festival Mall in Alabang. I think we were at Gilligans in Trinoma the other year. Anyways, we arrived in the restaurant a few minutes before 5pm, which made us a bit early for their "Chicken-all-you-can" promo, which starts at 6pm. It's tempting, because you get to have as much "sarap-to-the-bones" Max's chicken for only 165 Php (listen, I wasn't paid to do this, and I'm not promoting it in any way, ok). But it's my mom's birthday, so it's not really the right time to spend reluctantly.  Sky is the langit, I mean, the limit! - sagot ni Ate Be! Haha! I honestly don't like the promo anyway - it sounded to me like "cholesterol-all-you-can".

Then...

Tik-ti-la-ok!!! What the crock is that??? Everybody turned their heads to the direction where the sound was coming from. It was somewhere at the corner of the restaurant to my right...where two ladies were seated. I looked around and saw everyone with the what-the-fuck-is-that-clucking-stupid-chicken-all-about face, while the two ladies had the "no-no-no-it-wasn't-us" look. Hahaha... The speaker was on the ceiling atop the table where the two ladies where seated. We initially thought it's a promo similar to what they used to have, and that they're going to give each table a special dessert or sort of. But we were wrong. The clucking chicken was their signal for the start of the "chicken-all-you-can" promo. I could have gotten what it was had I known the time was 6pm.

It was a very simple celebration, but it was fun. Us going out together rarely happens. Looking forward to the next one. XD

NEW ADVENTURE...

PREPOST NOTE: I was initially considering putting this blogsite down for good. But I realized this blog, which you are currently reading, has my name on its title, so, more or less, it holds some meaning to me. So I decided to keep yffar's world, and make it my official-happy-site, and keep all the emoish-litany-blahs away. Expect to see more happy thoughts in this site moving forward. Future blahness and anything negative will be thrown to my other site.

Haven't been doing much these days. So, to make my slothful days, more or less, a little productive, I proactively volunteered to learn to cook. I didn't ask anyone to teach me, mind you. I taught myself. Teee heee! XD Yep, I'm learning to cook. Cooking was one task I thought I'd never learn to sit through. Hotdogs, other than eggs and bacon (hmmmkei, include here anything that only needs frying), were the only ones I can do. Well, until now, I can honestly say I do not really enjoy cooking (it's always a mess when I cook), but it is always good to learn to cook a few dishes. This month, I have mastered (?) a few pinoy dishes, and it's a great feeling to have someone ask you to make them something because they love how you make it. I am talking about my Spaghetti, which I want to call, Yffar's Spaghetti. Teee heee heee! XD My family just love it! My first attempt was more on the Italian-style-side, which I prefer, but my family being wanna-be-candidates for diabetes want my Spaghetti pinoy-style....sweet! I've already cooked it a couple of times, and, again, I'm going to make my mom one tomorrow because it's her birthday! Dyaran! XD Didn't get a chance to take some pics of my mastery before, but I have here some photos of the few dishes I cooked recently. Glad I was able to take some shots just before my family consumed everything.

Fried Pork Strips (marinated in self-made-BBQ sauce) with Fried Potatoes and a Special Dressing (I initially didn't know what to do with the pork. I didn't even know what to call this. Whew, glad it ended up good. )

Pork Nilaga. (This is the first Pinoy Dish I ever cooked. Not bad for a first timer. Teee hee! XD)

Tofu Sisig. Yummy! XD (healthy pulutan)

Other pinoy dishes I can make are Menudo and Pork/Chicken Adobo. Include here my Fried Chicken that can match Jollibee's Chicken Joy (now you know I'm bragging). I will try to take some photos and post them in the future. Okay, okay, okay, I know these are easy dishes, but hey, I never cooked before, and I am learning. XD

REMEMBERING TATAY

Birthday's over but nothing has changed. I only got a year older and that was it. Monday was one of the saddest birthdays I had. It started ok but didn't end well. Sorry, but I won't be blathering about that here. Today is my dad's death anniversary. And I want to use this small piece of cyberspace to write about him.

"June 17, 2004, Thursday. Around 8pm. My father died, but I didn't cry a single tear. In fact, I was quite relieved that my dad's suffering finally ended. My heart wasn't hurting at all, but my mind was not at peace. I didn't know what to do. I could not even pray calmly. Yes...I wasn't hurting, but my mind was lost. Or maybe I was hurting, but I was more relieved than hurt. My mom and all my sisters, except the eldest who was on her way home from work in Makati, were around my dad when he took his last breath. I was sitting on the sofa. Only a thin wall was separating my parent's room and the living room. I heard my sisters and my mom talking to my dad. I'm sure they were talking to him, but their voices weren't clear, like they were crying. They were whispering to my dad, until I heard my mom. Yes she was crying. And suddenly, her crying got louder. At that very moment I knew that my father was gone. I felt my mother's pain. But I didn't cry a single tear."

I'm the fourth child, and the only boy in the family. I can say I was my dad's favourite. My mom and sisters told me many times about how my dad was jumping in joy when I was born. I can say I was a daddy's boy... taking me with him wherever he does his sideline jobs on weekends. He knew a lot of things, and was a perfect handyman. One of the things he was best at is fixing car computer boxes, which, when I was 9 or 10, were nothing more than a green metal board with miniature buildings perfectly portrayed by capacitors and resistors soldered to it. Later I found out my dad was making around 10K pesos in every computer box fixed. Now I wish I know how to do it.

At age 10, I started to learn to drive... on my own. During that time, my father was teaching my other sister, who was 7yrs older than myself, to drive. I envied her because she was allowed to drive around the neighborhood. Well, my father also taught me the basics. He taught me how to start the engine, how to switch gears, and how to step on the clutch and the accelerator with control, but he only allowed me to drive the car forward and backward. I wanted to learn more but he said I was too young for serious driving lesson. He said he'd teach me more when I'm older. There was a basketball court outside our house where I can do more than just forward and backward driving, I thought. So being the very impatient and hard-headed me, I took the car keys one day, while he was busy doing something inside the house, and drove the car. I was very excited, and was determined to make history, and make my father proud. I wanted to surprise them. And yes, I did make history. On my first solo-driving attempt, I forgot to switch the gear to neutral and excitedly stepped on the accelerator and hit the clutch sloppily. Then Bang! I hit the washing machine that was standing a few feet away in front of the car. I froze. I didn't know what to do. I knew right there and then I got myself in a big trouble. I thought of restarting the engine to drive the car back to its original place but I was moved by another bang. It was my father. He hit the roof of the car and opened the door angrily and pulled me out by my arm. "Ang tigas ng ulo mo!" - then he hit me on my butt harder than he ever did. I knew I was wrong, and I understood I did something terribly stupid. I was so afraid to say a word, so I just ran back inside the house crying. And that was the end of my driving lesson. I wasn't even able to take the car outside the garage. He never let me hold the wheel after that.

from Remembering Dad (posted on June 17, 2009)

My dad was always with me when I needed him, even in times when I didn't. My father had so many expectations on me, being his only son. He was a perfect handyman, and he wanted me to be like him. He never told me that, but I felt and I knew that's what he and my mom wanted. He didn't do it for a living though. For him, fixing and rebuilding things was a hobby. His hands were very creative. In highschool, I learned to fix electric fan and flat iron, not because I wanted to, but I was told to do so. He said it is important for me to learn such things, especially that I am the man in the family. I felt pressured. I felt even more pressured because my older sister was better than me in fixing things. She had patience, and passion in troubleshooting things...which I didn't have. Everything, for me, was a drag... a big pain in the ass. There was even a time when I wished he'd leave me alone and just let me do what I want. And when I was starting my fourth year in college, he was diagnosed with cancer and was told he only had 6 months left to live. It was the saddest news I heard. Before that, I was thinking it would be liberating to know the time you have left on earth to work on. But after I heard about my father's condition, I realized it wasn't. I hate being told what to do, more so hearing people defining my own life. But being told I only have this amount of time to live is something I never want to hear.

"I didn't cry when Tatay died. But when he was brought to the cemetery, when we had our last chance to see his face before his casket was closed, while he was being put down, I saw myself crying like I never did... because I knew it was the last time we will ever see him... and he's not coming back."

Maybe I'd be better in making choices in life, and maybe my life would be different if he was still here giving me parental guidance. I used to be better with people. I used to be better with myself. But things are different now. I miss Tatay.

[Insert Pre-Birthday-Post Title here] :-)

I'm still alive.

Just surviving. A few hours more and I am officially another year older. Thank Gawd.

I am currently looking for a job. Ok...I haven't really been looking for a job, but I am waiting to get one. How it is going to happen is something...well, I do not know. I want to leave it all to fate. Afterall it is my birthday tomorrow! Good old fate might be nice enough to deliver a perfect job right at my doorstep, teee heee! Come on fate, I am waiting! Wait till all the stars under my zodiac signs are in their perfect locations...wait till the lucky astroligical bodies are aligned... wait till my body and spirit and desires are in sync...yaddah yaddah blah blah... Since I am again entering the call whoring business, I want to make sure that I get into a company I really want to be a part of. I do not enjoy working in this business, so I might as well choose a company that I really like to give myself a little consolation. I just hope they give me a call soon, puhleeeze... as I don't have money anymore. All my financial resources are gone and I am now, what you call, errrr, broke. You see, It is my birthday tomorrow and I am broke. How sad can that be? Working in a call centre is such a drag for me, but then again it is the only decent high paying job I can do. At least it gives me something to support my needs and my family's. Yes...call whoring business...arrghh...my body is sick and tired of it, but I've no better choice at the moment, so I'm sticking with it... for now.

You see, I've been blathering in this blog about my desire of finishing my Mechanical Engineering degree in Mapua but I have not done a thing about it since I stopped from schooling. I admit I need some parental guidance sometimes...maybe a little spanking too. I don't want to study and work at the same time so don't tell me to do just that. I am not that intelligent, ok. What I want to do is work, earn and save more than enough money, then go back to college. Now please tell me to walk my talk! Leaving college wasn't really my fault. It was a very tough time for my family when my father got sick a long time ago, so I willingly gave up my studies temporarily (which now looks permanently). Yes, it wasn't my fault, but I understand it is my responsibility, which, I had been trying to brush off my shoulder. A responsibility that I had been hoping someone in the family would take care of. I'm over that hopeful thinking, and am now taking full responsibility of it. Becoming an engineer was my dream when I was young, but things have changed now. It isn't a dream anymore. It's now, I think, just an option. The best option. Truth is, I really woudn't want to become an engineer now if I enjoy working as a call centre whore, and if titles and diploma do not matter. (This will be a short rant of an undergrad, pfft. Bite me) Why do titles and diploma matter in the first place? It's just a fucking piece of recycled paper. Why do local companies require their applicants to have a college degree when most international call whoring businesses don't? I don't get it. An undergrad can be hired by IBM, Convergys, HSBC, and by an international online research company and get paid very good, but can't get into a high-paying "local company"? Compare the odds. If an undergrad got the brains and talents and the desire, who the hell are they to tell him he's not worthy of a high paying 10am-6pm job? Who the fuck are they to tell him that they're smarter and have more value than him just because they have that fucking piece of laminated paper tucked in their sleeves and he doesn't? Ok, I kept on typing him when I meant I. I tried applying in a company sometime last 2007 and got rejected just because I didn't finish my degree. Did that ever happen to you? If not, you're lucky. According to statistics, 73 percent, of college freshmen, either drops out of college before reaching the senior year, or gets a different course and finishes it elsewhere where tuition is lower. They all want a degree so they can land a good job, preferably outside the country. And our moron government, instead of creating more jobs in the country, encourages its people even more to go and work as slaves abroad! I cannot blame our people if they want to. Who wouldn't, if salary is high and they were given the chance? Even I want to get the hell out of the country, for good. I wrote in my previous post about some "what if's" if fate and the powerful force of the universe chose the Philippines to be the most powerful country in the world and not America. Just imagine the Philippines outsourcing its jobs to the US and getting Americans to work as call centre agents for Filipino-owned companies, and forcing them to speak Tagalog in a neutral accent. Haha. Wouldn't that be great? XD

I'm thinking it might be better for me to just leave my desire of becoming an engineer. Quit jumping from one call centre to another and concentrate on becoming a professional telephone whore. Maybe I wasn't supposed to be an engineer. Maybe I was only placed by the universe in Mapua for a few years to help the future engineers pass their subjects by copying on me during exams. It's nice to work at night anyway, and I've been told many times I have the potential and talent to succeed in the call whoring business, so why am I wasting it? (Ooopss... Oh my Gawd, why am I saying these? Didn't I hate this job?)

I loathe the call whoring business, but I'm afraid my adolescent dream of becoming an engineer, or even just graduating, is slowly becoming a thing in the past. Pfft. A friend told me I have to make up my mind and decide and be serious with life before I get older. The climb is getting tougher each day. So, to the kind-hearted and well-off individuals out there who want to help me go back to college, you may leave a comment with your contact details so we can discuss how you can help me finish my Mechanical Engineering degree and be an engineer. Just think of it as a birthday gift for this talented young guy. LOL.

Pre-birthday cake dala ni Ate Nanz. Ubos to bago pa ako mag-birthday, haha.

AFTERWORD:

I'm jobless, I'm broke, but I'm happy. It's actually fun doing nothing! Well, it gets a little boring sometimes but the overall experience of bumming is still great (come on convince yourself more Raf). This is a pre-birthday post so I'm supposed to be happy. Hooray! XD

Pahinga muna sa EOP!

Pansamantala ko munang pinuputol ang EOP (english only policy) dito sa aking dot com. XD

Wala talaga akong balak magsulat ngayon. Nakakabagot rin kasi kung minsan ang magbato sa blog na ito ng kung ano mang nararamdaman ko. Halos lahat naman kasi ng mga naisusulat ko dito eh panay tungkol sa kalungkutan at depresyon. Malaya sa pakiramdam, oo, na para bang sumusulat ako sa isang napakalaking dingding na kita ng lahat, pero pagkatapos nito eh para bang bigla na lang akong napapaisip kung bakit ko nga ba talaga naisipang magsulat sa dingding ko. Aksaya sa oras, na sana ay napakinabangan ko sa mas makabuluhang paraan. Noong una, akala ko walang nagbabasa dito sa aking lungga, pero nagulat ako, dahil meron din pala! Sinubukan ko kanina na i-google ang aking lungga, Yffar's World. At wag ka, meron akong nakita na bumoto pala sa aking blog sa isang pakontest sa mundo nang blogasperyo noong nakaraang taon...ang Top 10 Emergerging Influencial Blogs of 2009. Whoaah...oo, sensya na, sobrang late ko na bago nalaman ang tungkol sa pakontest na ito, at nagulat talaga ako na merong bumoto sa akin, patunay na meron din palang mga napapadpad sa aking mumunting dot com at nagbabasa ng mga naisulat ko. Isang nominasyon lang naman ang nakuha ko, at ito ay galing sa isang blogeryo na nagtatago sa pseudo na Lio Loco. Salamat Lio! Hindi ko naisip na merong palang mag-iisip na "influencial" ang aking dot com. Medyo matagal-tagal rin kasi na halos malulungkot na panulat ang naipapaskil ko sa blog ko. Gusto ko sanang baguhin ang tema ng dot com ko, para naman makaimpluwensya ako sa tamang paraan. Bilang isang blogeryo, may responsibilidad ako sa mga mambabasa ko, pati narin sa mga hindi sadyang napapadpad sa aking dot com.

Sobrang sawa na ako sa paggawa ng wala. Sa mga ganitong pagkakataon masarap gumawa ng mga bagay na bihira ko lang gawin, gaya ng, errr, pagsulat sa dot com ko. Nangangalahati na ang 2010, at apat na post palang ang nagagawa ko dito sa aking dot com. Malayo ito kumpara sa 65 posts ko last year. Kaya naman naisip ko na pansamantala munang hayaan ang mga daliri ko na tumipa ng ilang letra, at dahil gusto ko na medyo maging kakaiba, hahayaan ko munang sumayaw ang aking mga daliri sa himig ng tagalergs. Oo, bawal muna ang EOP! Bihira lang ako magsulat sa sariling wika. Sa kagustuhan ko na mas malayo at mas malawak na mambabasa ang abutin ng aking dot com, napag-isipan ko na inglesh ang gawin kong opisyal na lingwahe dito. Minsan lang itong mga ganitong pagkakataon na pinipili kong magtipa sa tagalerg, na, totoo namang, hindi rin ako magaling. Kung ang magsulat sa inglesh o sa tagalergs ang mas mahirap, hindi ko masabi. Meron kasing mga pagkakataon na kusa na lang ang paglabas ng mga malalaim, malaman, at masining na mga kataga mula sa utak ko, inglesh man o tagalog. Kusang lumalabas. Hindi ito nangyayari ngayon, maniwala ka, haha. Kita naman na hindi masining ang pagsulat ko ngayon. Pero pakiramdam ko, mas "liberating" talaga ang pagsulat sa tagalerg. Mas malaya sa pakiramdam dahil hindi ako takot na magkamali. Walang maninita ng akda ko sakali mang may mga paglabag ako sa balarila kung tagalergs ang sulat ko. Wala lang pake. Kasi hindi naman ito isang sulating pormal kung saan pati ang istilo ay pinupuna ng mga letseng Filipino teacher. Shet, naalala ko na naman ang mga sulating pormal-pormalan na yan nung elementarya at high school. Mahilig ako magsulat dati sa tagalerg. Pero nabago yun nung 4th year high school ako. Linsyak kasi yung teacher ko dati sa Filipino. Linggo ng wika noon at may pakontest: essay writing sa wikang Filipino. Aba aba, alam ko na medyo may talento ako noon sa pagsulat kumpara sa iba kong kaklase. Ang mga estudyante lang sa honor section ang kasali sa palahok, kaya mas ok dahil konti lang ang kakumpitensya. Binasa isa-isa ng teacher namin sa Filipino ang mga essay namin, pero pagdating sa akin, umpisa palang, tinigil na nya ang pagbasa. Bakeet??? Kasi daw, masyado raw generic ang panimula ko sa essay ko. Sinumulan ko ang aking panulat gamit ang mga kataga ni Rizal tungkol sa malansang isda. Nyek na nyek talaga ako. Hindi man lang nya tinapos basahin ang kasunod. Hindi manlang nya napagtsagaang namnamin ang nilalaman ng sinulat ko. Nakakabadtrip talaga! Bilib-na-bilib pa naman ako noon sa gawa ko. Para akong sinampal sa muka gamit ng sarili kong tsinelas. Mga ganyang pagkakataon ang nagpapababa ng self-esteem ko. Pero ok rin naman dahil gawa ng kaibigan ko ang napili ni Mrs. Medina (hahaha, ayan nasabi ko tuloy pangalan nya! lol). Natuwa ako para sa kaibigan ko, kahit na hindi ako gaano bumilib sa sulat nya ng mabasa ko ito.

Pero noong nag college ako, biglang lumabas ang isang manunulat na hanggang sa ngayon eh nagtatago parin sa pangalang Bob Ong. Cool na cool ang dating sa akin ng istilo ng panunulat nya. Habang nagbabasa ng libro sa thermodynamics at heat transfer ang mga kaklase ko sa mapua, nandon naman ako sa isang sulok at nagbabasa ng ABNKKBSNPLAKo. Noong panahong ding iyon ko nadiskubri si Nanskii boi ng GBlogs! Sinusubaybayan ko pagbato nya ng mga post sa Gblogs nya. Tungkol lang sa mga pangyayari sa buhay-buhay nya ang sinusulat nya, pero sadya naman talagang nakakaaliw ang paraan nya ng pagkwento. Matapos ang ilang buwan na pagsubaybay ko sa dot com ni Nanskii Boi, napagpasyahan ko na gumawa ng sarili kong lungga sa Yahoo 360 Blogs. Oo, pero dahil takot ako na masyadong maimpluwensyahan nila Bob Ong at Nanskii, naisip ko na magsulat sa wikang inglesh. Ayun na ang simula ng paglikha ko ng sarili kong mundo sa blogosperyo. Online diary - kung saan ko ibinabato at isinusuka ang lahat ng hindi ko masabi sa ibang tao.
Pero gaya ng nabanggit ko kanina, mas "liberating" ang magsulat sa tagalerg. Hindi tulad kung sa wikang inglesh ka magsusulat. Marami dyan, nagbabasa lang para punahin kung may mali sa grammar ang sumulat. Ahem. Ewan ko kung bakit ko nasabi yan. Marahil ganito rin kasi ako sa iba?...pinupuna ko rin at kinukutya ang mga mali-maling grammar kung minsan ng ilang bloggers na nagpupumilit magsulat sa wikang inglesh. May punto rin ang kasabihang galit ang magnanakaw sa kapwa magnanakaw. Hindi naman talaga ako magaling magsulat. Sa totoo lang, kung minsan, feeling ko nga trying hard ako sa paggamit ng wikang inglesh sa pagsusulat. Wala naman kasi ako talagang pormal na pag-aaral sa pagsulat sa inglesh. Swerte ko na lang talaga at nagbigay talaga ako ng sapat na atensiyon sa mga inglesh teachers ko sa school. Kaya eto, kahit papaano eh napapakinabangan ko rin naman sa trabaho ang aking kaunting kaalaman. Pero swear, asiwa parin talaga ako sa ideya ng pagpupumilit magtunog amerikano. Hay naku. Pano kaya kung ang Pilipinas ang naging makapangyarihang bansa sa mundo at hindi ang Estados Unidos? Paano kung ang Amerika ang third world country? Paano kaya kung ang Pilipinas ang nag a-outsource ng trabaho sa Amerika? Ano kaya kung ang mga bwakinang Kano ang nagpupumilit magsalita ng tagalerg sa Filipino accent? Hmmm....
Imagine:

Agent: Mayruhmeeeng seyluhmet suh pughteweg, enow powng meypeg leeeleengkud kow suh inyow?
Customer: Putang-ina mo! Amerikano ka no? Tunog na tunog, ang pangit ng accent mo! I-transfer mo nga ako sa Pinoy, ayoko kumausap ng bobong kano na nagpupumilit magtagalog!
Agent: Puhseynsyuh nuh pow, ngoooneet hindeee kow pow keyow mayleeeleeeput suh on-shore center.
Customer: Pasensya, pasenya, puro nalang pasensya sinasabi nyo! Ang tatanga nyo naman! Mga putang-ina nyong lahat!
Agent: Sowreee pow teleguh mem. (magmu-mute at mag mumura din: fuck you bitch!)
Customer: Sawang sawa na ko sa kakasorry nyo, sawang-sawa na ako makipag-usap sa mga putang-ina nyong mga kano kayo! (sabay bagsak ng telepeno)
Agent: Damn, I don't want this job anymore... (habang nangingilid ang luha sa mata)

Oh di ba? Astig?! XD parang jejemons lang sila pag nagkataon, teeee heeee heeee! XD

Hindi ako kagalingan magsalita sa wikang inglesh, kaya kung minsan, sa panahong tamad-na-tamad na ako, hindi ko sinasadyang magtunog pinoy sa pagsasalita ko. Pinoy lang, pumapalya rin ang pekeng accent at grammar kung minsan. Nakakatanggap ako ng ilang magagandang papuri mula sa mga kaibigan ko sa trabaho, na kesyo lahat daw eh nakikinig kapag ako na ang nagsasalita. May kagalingan daw ako sa pakikipag-usap sa mga bwuakinang kano, hahaha. Pero ewan. Hirap ako kung minsan na tumanggap ng papuri. Hirap rin ako kung minsan na magbigay ng papuri. Sa mapagkumbabang lipunan na kinalakihan natin, hindi kailan man naging tama ang pagbubuhat ng sariling bangko. Kaya kadalasan, kahit alam natin sa sarili natin na may mas ibubuga tayo sa iba, nangingibabaw parin ang pagpapakumbaba. Humility is beauty, sabi nga ng mga kaibigan ko na sina Chris at Serge, pero ang humility na ito, kadalasan, sa ating mga pinoy, ay nagiging katumbas ng kawalan ng tiwala sa sarili. Magkaibang bagay ang pagpapakumbaba at kawalan ng tiwala sa sarili. At ang kawalan ng tiwala sa sarili ay isang bagay na gusto kong basagin.

Hay.... hindi ko na alam kung sa paanong paraan ko tatapusin itong tagalerg entry ko, haha. Ikalimang entry ko pa lang ito sa taong ito. Pagsinipag-sipag ako sa mga susunod na araw, baka masundan ito agad. O sige, tama na muna.
Back to EOP next time. XD

My Cat Kicked the Bucket

I have not had the time to give my bloggie a little update. I don't know, but there was actually a point when I thought what I was doing - writing about things that nobody really gives a shit about, was just a waste of time. Turned out it really was. Nobody even reads this blog for all I know. I had been spending too much time on the internet. I liked it because that's where I get social updates. But I realized I was missing a lot more than what I was getting from the virtual world. I had been, literally, wasting time. So i decided to temporarily put it off. Getting out of the box and discovering the real world, as what I call it.

The roads I am walking on are getting a little bit rocky again. I envy most of my friends. They know what they want in life, and they really are working hard to get them. Like they all have the inspiration that keeps them moving, and living. Like their lives are made of perfect circle and straight bold lines...clear, definite and complete. Well, I believe mine is also made of lines, only that they are dotted and they take shapes and forms in ways even I cannot predict and understand, hehe. There were so many things I wanted to do. They're so many that I didn't know what to do first and where to begin. 10 years ago, I was thinking I'd be a successful engineer by the time I reach 25. That I would have a million pesos in my bank account when I reach 27. And by 30 I'd have my own house, and car, and I'd be living with a family of my own...happy and fulfilled. Disappointingly, my life is far from what I was planning 10 years ago. I am over 25 (and overweight) and I am still undecided of so many things. Nothing significantly big happened in my life yet...no accomplishment and whatnot. I'm a failure, and that's the reality I have to admit myself sooner or later. I'm not proud of it, believe me, but I am not afraid to admit it neither. Know your weakness and acknowledge it so you would know how to make yourself better - that is something I read somewhere. This is the problem when you draw a plan for yourself and you fail to make them a reality. It's like hitting yourself with a hammer you bought yourself using your hard-earned money. How frustrating that is. I want to move on and set my priorities again. But I don't know where to begin.

I will be another year older, a month and some days from now. I actually am getting closer, each year, to death. Or maybe, I am now nearer my death than my birth. Who knows. Let me ask you, if you were given the chance to know how much time you have left to live, would you want to know it? You'd be able to prepare yourself and do things that you have never done before - like... errr... seeing something majestic or getting a tattoo or maybe having sex with the sexiest and most beautiful girl you swoon over. I was thinking it would be liberating to know how much time you have left to work on. Like a preparation, a review for the exam, before you kick the bucket and answer the gatekeeper's questions. Yes, it is probably liberating. But I don't know if people who have cancer and people who know they're about to die anytime soon see it that way. More likely not.

We had a new cat. Yes, we HAD a new cat. We had him about two weeks and some days ago, and now he's dead. My youngest sister got it from a grade school or high school friend of hers in Alabang. It’s just an ordinary cat, local - to be exact, just like the dirty ones you see wandering the streets of Manila. Ash died and I am really sad. He was only a month old...real small kitten. He was so small that my older sister didn't notice him playing around the kitchen while she was washing the dishes. To make the story short, my sister, who happens to have an eyesight over 10 times worse than mine and who happens to be real careless, stepped on him. And by the force of destiny or whatsoever fucked-up fate that is, my sister stepped on my cat's head...as if it was a predestined condition reflex - she stepped on Ash's head...he died. This wasn't the first time my sister killed a pet. When I was in elementary, and she was in high school, I remember, she also stepped on a puppy silently sleeping by the front door. The puppy also died. My sister is not overweight, if you think she is. I wasn't exaggerating it when I said her eyesight is over 10 times worse than mine. It really is. I only wear eyeglasses with grades of 200, and I have astigmatism of over 200. So just imagine my sister's eyesight. Ok ok ok...she never wanted to kill Ash. It was an accident. But I still hate her for killing my new cat. Now my sister has a new title, aside from being the house's "walking disaster". She's now the house's "pet-killer". Ash...I miss you. Huhuhuhu....

I lurrrv pets. Dogs and cats. And it really breaks my heart to see a pet die. You know how these cute and lovable creatures get into our hearts. We have had dogs all my life. Cats came when I was in high school. Muning, the cat who stayed with us the longest, died last January. We had her for over 12 years. I was in first year high school when we got her from our neighbor. Muning was a really good housecat. Great hunter. And a great cat-whore too. She gets herself pregnant, with out a husband, every year. Woohoo, what a horny cat! Teee heee! XD But you know, I believe Muning really planned it all. I don’t believe she was just that horny as a cat. It was a solid plan. A systematic tactic. Well, being the head of the tribe of cats in our house, Muning didn’t just make sure her hunting ability gets better. She also made sure she increases her tribe's members each year, thus, allowing themselves to kill rats more efficiently. I lost count of the number of cats we had during Muning’s reign. Pretty sure we had a lot. Muning was the very first cat we had, and when she died we thought she’d also be the last. Ash came to take her place, but he's gone too soon.

We were just practicing his springing and pouncing abilities the other day...

and now he's gone. (Insert sniffle here...)

Cavity Monster (a humbling experience)

I settled myself into a reclined padded seat, and she took out something that, from the corner of my eyes, looked very suspicious. OMG, please, no, NOOOOOO!!!! And I thought I was going to die, right there and then.

What I wrote above is not an excerpt from some lunatic-horror-movie. That, I thought, was what going to happen. Well, I paid a visit to the dentist last Sunday - an extra-curricular activity that one should be doing once or several times a year (see…I don‘t even know how often it’s supposed to be done), which I had been putting off since I graduated from High School. I am not really afraid of the dentist. I have just been too busy from school and work that I didn’t notice I had been ignoring my teeth. Good thing going to the dentist at least once a year was a school requirement when I was in High School. Buti na lang. @_@

And so last week - I finally felt something that I never felt since I was in grade school. I got toothache. Pretty embarrassing because I had to absent myself from work. Come on, how can one with a toothache concentrate at work?

My dentist was a petite woman, cute, in her twenties. She was maybe my age. I wanted to back out when I learned that it was going to be a young lady dentist. I am not discriminating the lady dentist (though I really believe that men are always better than women, haha). It was just that, the thought of drooling and spitting and crying in agony in front of a kinda-cute lady was a definite minus-pogi-points.

And so, she asked me to settle myself into the reclined seat, and soon she was cleaning and probing and poking my teeth nonchalantly. For some reason, the tube that was supposed to suck the water from my mouth was not doing what its job was. The dentist didn’t realize it, so while she was busy examining my teeth - I called her attention and pointed at my mouth, and said “Madami na pong tubig, doc”, although it sounded like “Mmmmarghgh ggkkkggkkk qqookk”. But being a highly trained professional that she was, she understood what I said perfectly. “Oooops, don’t swallow”, she said. But she was nano-second late. I accidentally, thus unwillingly, swallowed a portion of the water building inside my mouth (gross). And so she asked me to spit the water and gargle - something that she should have asked me to do before I was forced to swallow. Eek.

“Ay, muntik mo ng maubos ung tubig ah, may tira pa oh, hehehe…” the dentist said, trying to make a joke out of it. Yeah - right.

I am not really a gentleman by nature, but since I need her help, and I find her kinda-cute, I just smiled - though I made it obvious that I was not happy about it. It took her a minute or two to fix the water-sucking- machine. Then she went back with the cleaning and probing and poking my teeth until she came to a certain tooth, at the right-upper back region of my mouth, which had been giving me trouble for a week. Then I heard her say, tsk tsk tsk…something you never want to hear from anyone, especially from a dentist.

“Kailangan nating pastahan ‘to, at tatlong surface ang cover nitong sirang ngipin sa taas. Allowed ng apat ang card mo per year.”

Ah, ok - I said. “Go ahead doc, let‘s do this and be done with it.” I said.

And so I settled back in my padded seat and prepared for the real battle, and she started preparing some metal tools that I had not seen for a decade.

“This might hurt a little”, she said - then started working on it. The feeling was extraordinarily...painful. I felt her drilling in my tooth, reaching and hitting the nerves….and ooohhh… Ouch (times 10 times 10 times 10)!!! Then I passed out.

All is good after an hour. Thank goodness.

Well, with my experience with the dentist, I must say I learned something from it: that getting a toothache is really a humbling experience. I mean, you could be the President of the Philippines, or the richest man in the world, but when you have a rotten teeth…there’s no escape…you’re going to feel the pain whether you like it or not.

Now I wonder, when will my next dental appointment be? Maybe after another 10 years from now. Teee heee! XD

Rising from Blogging Hiatus! (dyaran!)

I'm sorry, but I am really having a hard time maintaining my blogsite because of work and all the post-work lifestyle activities I am into - like going to the gym, jogging, running, dancing, playing basketball, swimming, etc. With all these creative outlets that are more physically healthy and engaging, my time for blogging and writing has suffered. Hmmmkei...they're all lies. Well, I try to jog once in a while. I used to do it every other day, but because of my new schedule at work, jogging before or after work has become quite impossible (ikaw na ang mag jog before 2am and after 11am, sige...hehe) I know I need to further enhance (naks) my writing and communication skills, but bottomline is, that is what I do at work, right? I checked back the date on my last post in my blog. Wow - more than two months ago! This is the longest time I have been away from blogging. Well, what happened wasn't really a self-imposed blogging hiatus. I just got tired. That was just it. Lazy. As usual.

But I'm back now!

HAPPY ANNIVERSARY BLOGGIE!!!

Na miss ko ang site ko. It has been more than a year since I moved in Blogger. I forgot to greet my bloggie a happy anniversary. I am sorry, my bloggie. I failed to give you enough time and attention - for I was also busy looking for an equal time and attention. Woohaha, here I go again, doing another emoish-litany-blahness. I am sorry.

Certainly, I cannot live without connecting to the internet each day. Hmmmkei...I really can, but so long as I have access to the web, alam na! As a vital part of my urban lifestyle, this is the place where I get updates from the world. It only sucks that I get to find even the ones that I am not really interested with - to the point that I almost know, though againsts my will, what's going on in other people's "personal" lives.

Raffy says:

Screw you jerks, I don't care! I have my own problems too, yah know, so stop flooding my wall with all your nonsense!!!

Hahaha! XD

But I am guilty. At some point, I unconsciously(?) sent feeds of what I was doing and what I felt, especially when I were emotionally affected with whatever happened recently, without really thinking what others might think of them (or me). @_@ Not that I intend to increase my web presence and make others aware of my existence, just like what others really do. Some, let me say, errr, attention-deprived individuals, literally flood online-networking sites with messages like they own FB and its copyrights and that no one cares. Arrggh. So much for the freedom of expression.

And here's another thing I do not really get...why do some people "like" their own FB status??? One posts a message that says, "I am happy!", and just below it you see his/her username "liking" his/her own message. Redundant is not the word to describe it. I am sorry, but I really find it very stupid. You won't post it on your wall if you don't like it, will you? I have some friends who do that - it

is stupid, but what can I do? They're my friends, hahaha. XD

So much for today. I'm really happy to write my first entry for this year, hoooray! Yeahbah!!! Oh, I remember writing something about Villar and his crappiness in FB some weeks ago.

THE POINT OF THIS POST?

Wala lang. Teee heee! XD You get your own space in FB for your stupid status, so let me have mine. Afterall, this is my space you are looking at. Haha. XD Sige na nga, di ko na papansinin ang statuses nyo. Live and let live.

Ciao!

Lost to the sea (another emo-talk)

Ok, stone me and drown me. I ate my word when I said I was shutting this blog off and that I was happy. Well, I am happy in a way, but happiness doesn't really numb the pain. I ate my words by heartfully pouring my thoughts and my feelings in this blog yet again. Guess I'm not really tired afterall. I thought I was tired of feeling this way, but it appears I still have a lot of emotion and hurt to throw in this blog. I don't want to think I thrive in loneliness and sadness, but I've learned to live with them. I don't enjoy it, really, but this is how I want to be found. Baka maawa kasi sya pag nakita nya akong ganito. Heck, dapat matagal na. Baliw din ako eh. I sometimes wish I can take something to numb the pain, but then again, that pain I wanted to extinguish is the same pain that bears the memories and reasons why I still find myself smiling at times. Pasensya na, hindi ko na mapigilan. Baka bigla na lang ako sumabog. So go ahead, kill me.

I wonder why I continue writing on this emo-slash-forsaken blog. Nobody ever reads this blog for all I know. It's all the same shitness, only different day. Please quit reading if you don't want to read anything negative. This might just add up to your own shitness in life. Life is aleady full of dirt, and I don't want to add up to yours. Feel free to close this window, and hop some site else. I am not giving you the burden to stay and read this almost-endless-emoish litany blah.

BLAH.

I'm not in the mood for anything good. I want to burst. I am starting a new job on Friday, but I'm still not sure if it's what I really want. I've quitted the call whoring job a couple of times, but here I am again entering the same old shit. Gone tired of being sick and tired of being sick and tired in the whoring business, but life is really giving me no other choice, or siguro takot lang akong sumubok ng bago. Maybe. I'm tired of getting stupid calls from people asking about equally stupid questions. They're calling because they have issues, and most of the time these issues are just because of plain stupidity. Geez. The world is truly reeking of stupidity, and so does this blog you might say. To make things worse, we, and all the people working in the call whoring business are slowly becoming part of that hellishly moronic population and we don't even notice it. Or maybe it is just me. Dinamay ko pa kayo, pasensya na. About my new job, I will play it by ear. I cannot guarantee that I will last a long time in my new-but-not-new company. I just want to earn enough money to do what needs to be done.

Everyday is a an effing tug-o-war between the rational "I-want-to-be-happy-and-start-over" and the ever hopeful "i-don't-believe-in-changes-and-i-don't-go-back-on-my-word". I'm tired. But I really don't go back on my word. I don't want to.

Dyos mio!

Bakit nga ba ako nag-aaksaya ng oras sa pagsasabi ng mga bagay na para sa iba ay wala namang kakwenta-kwenta at wala ni hibla ng katuturan? Hindi ko alam, pero ang oras at panahon ko ay bahagi ng isang malaking konsepto ng pagkatao ko na mahirap arukin at intindihain kahit na ng mismo kong ulirat. Gusto ko lang ibahagi kahit na alam kong hindi naman ako naiintindihan ng mga taong napapadaan ng hindi sadya sa site na to...kahit na katumbas lang sya ng pag-ihi ko sa pader ng harapan pero kailan man ay di ko pa narinig na nagmura at umihi sa akin ng pabalik. Gaya ng pagbulong ko sa mga alaga kong aso paminsan-minsan ng mga saloobin ko na hindi ko maipasa sa mga tao. Kung minsan kasi, mas tao pa kung makinig ang mga aso kesa sa mga tunay na tao.

I'm sorry for wasting your time. This will be the last, I hope. Next time I'll try to write something funny or useful. Christmas is near.

picture: http://milesgore.deviantart.com/art/Discontent-84487845

Happiness

is a choice. But being happy doesn't always numb the pain and yearning. I want to think that everything is cool, but reality doesn't really match my expectations and desires. (insert sniffle here).

Meron namang naghihintay na jeep na walang laman, pero bakit ba gusto ko pa ring sumakay sa puno na?

HILING

Minsan di ko maiwasang isipin ka
Lalo na sa t'wing nag-iisa
Ano na kayang balita sayo
Naiisip mo rin kaya ako

Simula nang ikaw ay mawala
Wala nang dahilan para lumuha
Damdamin pilit ko nang tinatago
Hinahanap ka parin ng aking puso
Parang kulang nga kapag ika'y wala

At hihiling sa mga bituin
Na minsan pa sana ako'y iyong mahalin
Hihiling kahit dumilim
Ang aking daan na tatahakin
Patungo...

Ala-ala mong tinangay na ng hangin
Sa langit ko na lamang ba yayakapin
Nasan kana kaya, aasa ba sa wala

At hihiling sa mga bituin
Na minsan pa sana ako'y iyong mahalin
Hihiling kahit dumilim
Ang aking daan na tatahakin
Patungo sa iyo, patungo sa iyo

Ipipikit ko ang aking mata dahil
Nais ka lamang mahagkan
Nais ka lamang masilayan
Kahit alam kong tapos na
Kahit alam kong wala ka na...

At hihiling sa mga bituin
Na minsan pa sana ako'y iyong mahalin
Hihiling kahit dumilim
Ang aking daan na tatahakin
Patungo sa iyo, patungo sa iyo

-Silent Sanctuary