They say happiness is a choice, and that you'll know you are doing the right thing when you make a decision and your heart is at peace. I'm not really happy, nor sad, nor my heart at peace, but I am ok. Just ok. Not great but ok. I'll settle with an ok-state for now than being troubled.
I was supposed to get a 4am sched at work starting on Monday, but I declined it. I don't feel like waking up at 2am - it's just damn too early. I wanted to get a morning sched, like 11am (ano ako swerte?), but they're not giving me that option. Insert sniffle here.
Had nothing to do yesterday. And so sometime afternoon I took a bath and put on a decent shirt. Didn't really know where I wanted to go. I only had one thing though in my mind yesterday, and that was to kill time. While inside the tricycle I decided I want to go to ATC, and so I did. I went there alone - as usual. I thought of watching a movie, but I just did the other night in Glorieta, so I took it off my list. After my failed attempt to withdraw cash out of an offline HSBC ATM machine, I continued walking inside ATC, till I remembered I have Albom inside my bag. Great. I finally settled for Starbucks. I'm not really a Starbucks fan like few of the people I know. In fact, I used to hate people who go there for coffee. I mean, why would someone spend 150 bucks for a cup of coffee??? But when I finally had my own laptop a year and some months ago, I realized it's not really just the coffee in Starbucks that people swoon over. It's also the cosy atmosphere and the free WiFi and AC.
"Chocolate Cream Chip please, Venti."
The place was quiet, which is good. Very conducive for people who need time to think. I promised myself I'd start reading "Have a Little Faith" by Albom, maybe read a few chapters before going home. I chose the most comfortable seat inside the shop beside the glass wall - a perfect view to see the people passing by. Albom is really best served and enjoyed in a nice place like this. But the Marimba-slash-samba-slash-jazz-slash-sax-slash-yaddah-yaddah Muzak playing inside the coffee shop was a bit irritating to my ears, so I plugged my earphones back and played my music player. Nothing beats listening to "my" music. Albom plus my music plus chocolate cream chip...orgasmic! I wish life is as simple as that.
I thought "Have a Little Faith" was a fiction, but turned out its a real-life story about two different men Albom knows personally. Yep, it's like his "Tuesdays with Morrie." Dang Raffy, did you not see the cover of the book??? It clearly says "a true story"! You're so makulet! Hahaha.
"But now it's over, it's over, why is it over?
We had the chance to make it
Now it's over, it's over, it can't be over
I wish that I could take it back
But it's over"
Gawd. what now Raffy? I don't know what to write now. I started this post with Starbucks and Albom but suddenly I dropped it, and pretty much walking away from it. Bakit? I don't know how to finish it eh. Hahaha. You see, just like yesterday, I, again, am just killing time. I think this is what my problem is. I want to keep a regular blog but I couldn't even think of a good damn thing to write about. Hahaha, wala talaga akong katulad.
Life goes on. It really should. So long as the music is playing, you gotta dance dance dance and dance. Like Naruto, Sasuke, and Gaara, I have always known what loneliness is. But I am ok now. There are just some things and dreams that don't belong to you. Or, it could also be the other way around. You just don't belong to those dreams.
Saan kaya ako susunod na magtatrabaho?
Tired of blathering about myself. My laziness, inconsistency, imperfections and all that - everybody who reads this blog knows about 'em. But I guess that makes me a normal human and that makes me unique. It's almost 4pm. Labas muna ako computer screen. Iwanan laptop bahay. Dala libro at psp. Pagpapatuloy ang have a little faith someplace else. XD