Bouncing Out?

Where's the "Welcome Back" banner here?

Sa totoo lang, hindi ko gaano na miss ang sarili kong blog.  I was, in fact, trying to find 101 reasons to bounce out this site.  I made a list of it but only ended up with 79.  Pffft...  If my blog was a real baby, it would be dead and rotting by now, reeking with kick-ass worms.  Yes, I really really really am a bad blog-parent.  Shoot me.

Cracked a few books, and comic books, and did new paintings, during my almost-permanent internet hiatus.  Read three series of Neil Gaiman's The Sandman, Budjett Tan's Trese 1 & 2, Gerry Alanguilan's Elmer, Stephen King's The Gunslinger, Chuck Palahniuk's Rant, Haruki Murakami's Kafka on the Shore, and WM Paul Young's The Shack.  These are just some of the books I added recently to my small collection  of books.

What have I been doing?  Work and work!  I barely had the chance to do some artwork in the past  months.  Takte kasing trabaho yan eh!  I'm not whining.  Sa totoo lang maganda nga na may trabaho ako na may disenteng sweldo at libreng tinapa.  Yun lang, taena lang talaga yung kumpanya at mga boss ko, panay ang pa-overtime!  This may sound redundant and downright uninteresting so I'm stopping now.

Anyway, here are some of my new paintings...

"Untitled" Acrylic on 24 x 18 inch canvas
I made this back in March, but decided to put a darker shade on it.
(yes, a schlock version of Angels by Raphael)

"Outside" Acrylic on 16 x12 inch canvas

"Rusted"  Acrylic on 20 x 24 inch canvas

The photos above were taken using a 3.2mp phone camera, so they're not really of good quality (just saying they look better in actual, hahaha!).  All these are just sitting in one corner of my room, collecting roach-dirt and dust.  Walang mapaglagyan sa bahay eh.  Gusto nyo ba? :)

This is it for now.  Wala lang.  Pumampam lang ngayong araw.

Byerts!

Kabute

Medyo matagal pala akong nawala.  Dalawang buwan mahigit din akong hindi nakabisita sa mga regular kong dinadalaw.  Kamusta naman kayo dyan? XD

Wala akong intersanteng paksa ngayon.  Sa totoo lang, napadaan lang ako dito para lang masabing, errr, dumaan ako.  Baka kasi isipin nyo patay na ako.

Ang hirap mag-isip ng  sasabihin.  Sabaw pa rin ang utak ko mula sa trabaho.  Limang araw na diretso ang pahinga ko ngayon kaya nagkaroon ako ng pagkakataon na makabisita dito.  Balak ko noong magpunta ng beach.  Kahit saan sanang beach.  Pero dahil sa mabait akong anak at kapatid - sa bahay lahat napunta ang maliit kong kita sa tindahan ng tinapa at sa pabrika ng toothpick.  Balak ng mga kaibigan ko na magpunta ng Pagudpod sa May, pero mukang hindi parin ako makakasama doon.  Bull.  Pero ok lang, medyo matagal naman akong pinalamon sa bahay, kaya marapat lang na punan ko naman ang mga bagay-bagay at responsibilidad na tinanggal ko sa balikat ko noong isang taon.

At dahil nga nakabakasyon ako, nagkaroon ako ng pagkakataon na humawak ng brush at pintura.  Tatlong buwan na rin nung huli akong humawak ng brush at pintura, kaya medyo nanibago ako.  Mukang ok naman ang kinalabasan.

"Le Musicale Masturbateur"
Acrylic on 24x18 inch canvas

"Moony"
Acrylic on 24x18 inch canvas

Gusto ko sanang sumali sa  isang painting workshop para naman magkaroon ako ng "totoong liksyon" sa pagpipinta, at hindi lang basta painting-paintingan.  May nakita ako doon sa Edsa Shang noong isang buwan, pero nanghinayang ako dahil medyo may kamahalan pala ang bayad sa ganoon.  Hay, ipambibili ko nalang ng canvas at pintura ang pambayad.

Sa Miyerkules eh babalik na ulit ako sa pamilihang bayan ng Muntinlupa para muling magtinda ng tinapa.  Medyo magaling na ako bumenta, at marunong na akong mag up-sell ng atsara.  Hindi na ako napapanisan ng paninda, haha. XD  Sa Huwebes naman ang balik ko sa pabrika ng toothpick.  Lunes pa lang naman ngayon.  May dalawang araw pa ako para mag relax.

O sya, sa susunod na lang ulit.  Ayoko ng magsabi na magbabalik ako dito kaagad.  Baka kasi mauwi na naman ako sa paglamon ng sarili kong salita.  Sabi ng isa kong kaibigan na napapadpad dito, para daw akong kabute, bigla na lang sumusulpot at nawawala.  Sus, ang kapal ng muka na magdemand na magsulat ako, ni-hindi naman nagko-comment.

Byerts! XD

Malamig ang gabi, ang sarap [tapusin ang pangungusap nang ayon sa iyong konsensya]

Ang lamig!  Nitong mga nakarrrrrraang gabi napansin ko na parrrrrrang sobrrrrrra ang lameeeeeeg.  Parang wala ako sa Metro Manila.  Sa katunayan, nakajacket ako ngayon (na ilang buwan ko ring hindi nagamit) at may malamig na milo (malamig parin) habang tumitipa sa keyboard.  Sarap!  Hindi naman ako nahilig sa mainit na inumin.  Mapa-kape o tsokolate gusto ko laging malamig, kahit na malamig na ang paligid.  Ang sarap sanang may kayakap sa mga panahong tulad nito - bed weather.  Pero dahil wala naman akong syota at walang chicks na gustong yumapos sa aking slightly chubby na pangangatawan,  pasimple ko na lang yayakapin mamaya ang aking sariling mga bisig sa pag-idlip.

Medyo marami akong ginawa nitong nakaraang linggo.  At mas magiging busy na ako lalo kapag natanggap na ako sa inaaplayan kong tindahan sa pamilihang bayan ng Muntinlupa.  Matutupad ko na rin ang pangarap ko na maging tindero ng tinapa.  Actually, pangarap yan ng bunso naming kapatid.  Ako na lang ang tutupad para sa kanya. Tamad kasi sya mag-aral noong elementary sya at ang panakot nila nanay sa kanya eh magiging tindera sya ng tinapa paglaki nya kapag hindi sya nag-aral ng mabuti.  Malugod naman nya iyong tinanggap - bumanat pa na marangal naman daw na trabaho ang pagtitinapa.  Tama naman.

Noong Biyernes eh dumalo ako sa kasal ng aking mabuting kaibigan na si Chris.  Sa St. Joseph Church sa Las Piñas ang kasal.  Hindi ka tiga-LP, siguro ay hindi ka pamilyar sa St. Joseph Church, pero malamang sa malamang ay narinig mo na ang pamosong Bamboo Organ.  First time kong makapunta sa simbahan na 'yon, at 'yon na rin ang aking unang pagtapak sa simbahan at unang kasalan na inatenan ko sa taong ito.  Oh di ba, back-to-back-to-back ang first time, kaya nag wish ako.  Hindi naman para sa akin ang wish ko kundi para sa bagong kasal.  Na sana ay maging matiwasay at habambuhay na maligaya ang kanilang pagsasama!

Napadami ako ng kain sa reception.  Bihira lang kasi ako maka-attend sa mga ganoong handaan kaya sinulit ko talaga ang buffet dinner. Sa mga kasalang napuntahan ko, never pa ako sumali sa kahit anong pakulo, kaya nung naramdaman ko na malapit na magsimula ang paagaw ng garter, palihim na akong umeskapo.  Pero hindi rin natuloy ang balak ko dahil bago pa man ako makalabas eh narinig ko na si Chris na tinatawag ang pangalan ko sa mikropono - ayown, hindi na ako nakatanggi.  Dahil lagi na lang iniiwasan ang garter sa mga ganitong okasyon, binaliktad ng host ang mekaniks.  Ang makakakuha ng garter - OUT.  Inulit-ulit ang paghagis hanggang sa isang lalaki na lang ang naiwang hindi nakakahuli sa garter.  At si Kaloy ang lalaking 'yon.  Pero sinadya talaga ni Kaloy na hindi makiagaw sa garter.  Hmmm...maparaang bata! XD

Hindi pa doon natapos ang gabi dahil pagkatapos ng reception ay dumaan pa kami sa bahay nila para sa isa na namang equally engrandeng kainan at inuman.  May mga pictures pero hindi ko na dito ilalagay, tinatamad ako mag upload.  Eto na lang ang picture ng bagong kasal.  Hindi pwede ang close-up dahil wala naman akong pahintulot na ilagay ang larawan nila dito.



Chris and Joy. XD



At kahit na hindi nya ako kinuhang bestman o kahit groomsman man lang (nagtatampo talaga? haha), ibibigay ko parin sa kanya ang painting na ginawa ko talaga para sa kanila.  Hindi ko dinala noong araw ng kasal kasi wala naman akong dalang sasakyan, at saka nagdadalawang isip pa kasi ako noon kung ibibigay ko nga ba yung painting o hinde, hahaha, pero syempre ibibigay ko talaga sa kanila.  Ewan ko, medyo nalulungkot lang kasi ako na ipamigay yung painting, para kasing may sentimental value na sa akin ang bawat isa sa mga simpleng pinta ko kahit ba parang kinahig lang sila ng manok na nagtampisaw sa pintura.  Buti sana kung bibilhin, kikita pa ako, hahaha. :-)  Invited ako sa Thursday sa bahay nila Chris para mag lunch (actually, sinabi lang na pumunta ako nang lunchtime sa kanila - hindi naman sinabing papakainin ako ng lunch.  assuming lang ako).  Dun ko na lang ibibigay ang painting nila. Panget ang painting ko, pero mas may halaga 'yon sa tingin ko dahil may labor of love ang regalo ko.  Isang simpleng pinta na maituturing ngunit extra special dahil bahagi iyon ng aking pagkatao - at iyan ang matatawag kong tunay na regalo; higit sa anu mang pera, plato, mug, rice cooker, plantsa, picture frame, kaserola, arinola, atbp., na regalo ng iba.  Haha. XD  O sya, akin na talaga ang perfect gift.  Hahaha! XD

Oh, byerts!

Mon Objet D'Art V [yeah, i think i need to put up a new site for my paintings]

Kahapon ko talaga balak gumawa ng panibagong pinta, pero nagkaayaan bigla sa bahay na manood ulit ng sine.  Si Creamer ang dapat kong kasama na manonood ng Dalaw (takte sakit sa batok ng tili ni kris, ampanget pang umarte), pero dahil wala naman akong pera at ayaw ko namang magpalibre sa kanya, sinabi ko na ipagpaliban nalang muna namin ang movie-date.  Prinsipyo ko yan sa buhay - hindi dapat kelan man nagpapalibre ang lalake sa babae (pero kapag kapatid ko ang manlilibre, ok lang, nyahaha). Madalas ay gabi ako gumagawa dahil mas sanay ako na gising sa gabi dahil narin sa nagdaan kong trabaho (hindi sa putahan, pero parang ganun narin ang nature) pero tinamad ako bigla, medyo nandidilim kasi ang paningin ko.  Pakiramdam ko ay mas mabilis na tumatanda ang mga mata ko.  Bihira na nga ako magbasa ng libro ngayon sa dilim eh, at kumakain na rin ako ng kalabasa at kerots at iba pang gulay na pampalinaw ng paningin, pero parang hindi naman gumagana.  Oktubre lang noong 2009 ako nagpagawa ng bagong antipara, tapos ngayon parang kelangan ko na naman ng bago.  Pfft.  Magpapagawa na lang siguro ako ng panibago pag nagkapera na ulit ako.

Iniisip kong baguhin ang psuedo ko, o ang pangalan mismo ng site na ito.  Kasi, errr, nitong mga nakaraang araw, nadiskubri ko na meron din palang ibang blogger na gumagamit ng pangalang yffar at raffy (at napakaselfish ko talaga para isiping ako lang ang pwedeng magtaglay ng pangalang yan sa sangkablogosperyohan, haha).  Hindi naman sa pinagdadamot ko ang pangalan ko, ang akin lang naman eh, sa mundo kung saan hindi naman lahat ay kilala ako sa drama ng totoong buhay, tanging pangalan ko lamang ang maaarin kong iwanan bilang bakas ng pagkakakilanlan.  Hindi ko na ieexplain ng husto.  Pag-iisipan ko muna kung dapat nga ba akong magpalit-ngalan, o kung paninindigan ko nalang na isa lamang ako sa mga bloggers na may napakasimpleng pangalang yffar/raffy.  Pfft.

At para paikliin na nga ang mahabang pasakalye, dahil nahihilo nga ako kagabi, kanina na lang ako nagsimulang gumawa ng panibagong artwork.  Dyaran!



"untitled" Acrylic on 20x16 inch canvas.
Floral abstract using large brush strokes.  It was fun creating this. XD

Isang klase ng brush lang ang ginamit ko dito (1 inch brush), at natutuwa ako na maayos ang kinalabasan ng eksperimento ko.  Mas makulay yung nauna kong ginawa na still-life, pero parang mas gusto ko ang isang ito kasi mas nag-enjoy ako sa pag-gawa nito, kaya naisip ko na ito nalang ang ibibigay ko sa kaibigan kong ikakasal sa susunod na linggo. XD

Matatagalan pa bago ko masundan ito.  Wala na kasi akong canvas.  Marami pa naman akong oil at acrylic paints, pero ibat-ibang shades lang ng green, yellow, at red.  Kung marami lang sana akong pera pambili ng canvas/plywood/cardboard, mas mapapadalas ang pag-eeksperimento ko.  Kaso, kailangang magtipid, so tiis muna sa libog ko sa pagpipinta, haha. XD

Byerts!



Mon Objet D'Art IV

Here is a new work I made yesterday (yep, my first in 2011) which I plan to give as a wedding gift to a very good friend.  Ikakasal sila in two week's time.  Wala akong extrang cash pambili ng regalo, so ok na siguro ang isang simpleng painting.  Again, I'm not a schooled artist, kaya wag sana masyadong laitin, haha.  Titigil din ako pag naubos na ang pintura ko. XD

"untitled" Acrylic and Oil on 20x16 inch canvas

I might do another one tomorrow.  Pagpipilian ko nalang kung alin ang mas magandang ibigay na regalo.  Kung hindi man ako makagawa, baka yan na lang talaga ibigay ko.

Below is another simple work I started last week (or last year, technically), as requested by my sister.  This is completely her idea.  Gusto daw nya ng teddybear na may passport - ibibigay daw nya sa kaibigan nyang papaalis ng bansa.  Ewan ko dun, aalis na ng bansa gusto pang bigyan ng bitbitin.  Hindi pa yan tapos, may kung ano pa syang pinapagawang shit dyan.

Acylic on 12x9 inch canvas

Tinatamad na akong tapusin yung teddybear-project nya.  Bahala na kung sipagin pa ako.

O sya.  Byerts! XD

Setting the Holiday Mood [new title]

Christmas won't be as much as fun as last year on two counts. One, I'm unable to find a job I really like (like, not need), and two, I have no money to buy gifts. I'm hoarding what's left of my little dough and I'm trying not to waste it so I'm spending a lot of my time at home. The only time I went out to have fun was last Thursday. It was Serg's birthday and booze was free - thank Gawd, alcohol! In the local news, both cases against Hayden Kho and Hubert Webb were dismissed. Well, I don't care much about Halili, but I feel sorry for Mr. Vizconde because I really think Webb is the culprit.  (It's obvious that I'm telling about the local news for the lack of better things to say). Pfft... oh well, I don't really give a flying fuck about Kho and Webb. Really.

I feel soooo sad that it's Christmas and I'm broke. Pfft. Paano na ang pamilya, mga kaibigan, at mga inaanak ko? Call me materialistic, but you'd know that I love you, or care about you, if I spend money on you. Please don't lecture me about different ways of showing love other than giving gifts. I know and I recognize them all. It's just that, with me showing love to others, giving gifts is the easiest. Besides, money is something that I don't have lots of, so I really value it. Words of affirmation, physical touch, quality time, and acts of service are the other love languages that I appreciate and recognize.  It's me expressing these love languages to others that I'm having trouble with. I'm really sad (and I'm saying this again, I know) but this isn't depression - though I've called this as such countless times before. What I used to know as depression is really dissatisfaction, and you may call this a case of paradigm shift. Wanting what I don't have (moolah) and taking the things I have for granted, just like what many other people do to make their already complicated lives more complicated - is nothing but dissatisfaction.  For me, it's the root of all sadness.  It's funny that I'm aware of this, yet here I am whining about being broke and sad and blah blah shit blah. Hmmkei, I really shouldn't be sad, because I'm lucky I have a home and family! Many people don't have both.

Oh...love? What is it? Pfft.

Well, sorry dear bloggy, your parent is a bore. When you're not able to go out and record, things don't happen that much. I just felt I needed to write something here so you'd know I'm alive.

Not much to blather about today, so I'll just post my new paintings (or stained cloth, if you prefer calling it that way) I made last week.



Acrylic on 20 x 14 inch canvas

  

Acrylic on 18 x 12 inch canvas



There's actually another one, but I'll post it some other time.  Wait, how about my paintings as Christmas presents?  Hmmm.... never actually thought of it.  Sounds like a good idea, but, errrr, I don't have new canvases.  Oh well.  I'm not good in giving hugs and kisses, but that's all I have.  Tsaka pag-ibig, katatagan, at pag-asa.  Babawi na lang ako next year.  Promise.

Byerts!





Mon Objet D'Art III

Had too much of slothful moments the past few days (weeks/months, actually), so I decided to edit my previous works and reapply oil paints.  They look better now (I think).



"Under the Bloody Sky" Oil on 18x24 inch pre-stretched white canvas





a closer look of the Old barn



"Efetsem" Oil on 30x20 inch pre-stretched white canvas

Both are, ahemmmm, for sale [if anyone is interested (baka sakali lang) - haha, parang may bibili].

Below are my most recent works in acrylic.  Pls don't mind the colours and the styles I used.  I'm not a schooled artist, you know.  I'm a learning painter and I'm pretty much trying to discover my own style.

"Into the Misty Woods" Acrylic on 15x21 plywood



"Untitled" Acrylic on 15x21 plywood



Both were painted on wood (plywood, and they're back to back - tipid mode, haha) as I still don't have canvas.  Well, it doesn't really matter whether I paint on a real canvas or not, i'm just practicing anyway.  I enjoyed creating those heavy strokes in the painting showed in the last pic.  It's inspired by a painting I saw in the ManilArt exhibit.  I'm not sure what this style/genre is called, but it looks more like of the expressionism (check out Stary Night by Van Gogh).

This is all for now.  Ulitin ko lang, for sale yung dalawang oil painting, teee heee!  XD  Byerts!

Early Christmas Gift, yeahbah!

Whoooo peeeee! :-) What a great day it was for me! I mentioned in my previous post that I have a small package to pick-up in QC. Well, I got it this afternoon. *insert-happy-dance-here* All the while I thought I was gonna get some chocolates or something usually given as pasalubong (like a shirt or a bottle of  perfume), but to my surprise I got something even better!

I got these...

Not chocolates, but better. XD

This is from Sir Jaime, from Seattle, WA, whom I have known online for quite some time. It's just soooo kind and soooo generous of him to give me all these - a set of acrylic and oil paints (big tubes), paint brushes of different types and sizes (total of 40 brushes!), a brush cleaner, acrylic mediums, 2 palettes and a palette knife, colored pencils, a calligraphy kit, 2 Books, and more.  The wood palette and some of the brushes were actually made in China.  Funny that they had to travel to the US only to be sent back to Asia. When I saw the entirety of what I was told to pick up, I was like - "are you serious you're giving me all these?"  What I received was way greater in quantity than what I originally purchased when I started painting a few months back.  This is an early Christmas gift!  Ang dami-dami at amoy Seattle, Washington pa! Hahaha.

*Thanks again Sir Jaime, I really appreciate everything!  May God bless you and your loved ones!  Btw, thanks also to your daughter and her secretary for being nice when I came to pick up the package (I'm just quite disappointed they didn't offer me anything to drink - hahaha, NO - just kidding sir!)  Ang bait-bait nyo po, I'll buy you lunch when you come over Manila next year.*

Now that I got big tubes of paints, I just need to get some pre-stretched canvas so I can get back into painting. I'm aware I'm not a schooled artist and I never took any art lesson before, but some say I'm doing pretty good for a newbie (LOL yabang lang). And as a learning painter, being restricted by perspectives and shadows is something I don't want to get myself into. That's why I identify with folk art. My instinct to paint and my will to learn are greater than my inhibitions about painting, and I guess that's one good quality I have. Yes people, I paint from my heart (drama ang potah, haha). There were even nights before when I got so engrossed in painting that it was 4am before I realized the time. That's how much I enjoy doing it. Much like having sex, you know. Hahaha, just kidding. Sex is better.

Recently I realized how blogging can be a good source of online friends, but that would be impossible if I continue writing emoish-blahness, which nobody really wants to read. Come on, the world's already full of shit and negative vibes and I no longer want to add up to it. But, errr, bad things do really happen sometimes, so I still might throw some of them here unconsciously (and consciously). This is MY blog, bite me. Oh well, I am, again, speaking in paradox, haha. Kidding aside, should bad things/news/experience come my way, I'd just let it go. Much like reading a book - turn the page when it's done.

I find blogging now a bit of a challenge, but I'm up for it. I mean, I want to thrive on the challenge to write something that people will enjoy, and learn and benefit from. Not a small thing, I know.

That's all for tonight. Byerts people!

 
 

ManilArt 2010

Had a great day at the ManilArt 2010 Contemporary Art Fair at the Mall of Asia, SMX Convention Centre. It was very inspiring to see the works of the country's finest contemporary artists.  Thanks to my friends at Boston Gallery who gave me a free pass.

Tinatamad ako magtype, here are some pics I managed to take.

SMX Convention Center H4 -ManilArt 2010

The Ticket! :-)

Yeabah!  It's free! :-)  You see...it's always good to have some connection in the business. :-)

This work has an "added-value" light and audio effect. One of my fave at the fair.

  

The guy beside me is Demet Dela Cruz...creator of "Push the Red Button to Activate" - that's the mixed-media painting behind us.

(Oil on canvas)

  

(Mixed media on canvas)

(Mixed media on canvas)

(Oil on canvas)

Metal Sculpture (the intricately designed wings move - run by electricity, of course.)

(Oil on canvas)

Mixed Media on wood. Can you find the hidden Mickey? hehehe..

(Oil on canvas)

(Oil on canvas)

Dedicated to the call center peeps. (Oil on canvas)

(Metal sculpture)

(Oil on canvas)

Futuristic Bull (again, not the title)

(Oil on canvas)

(Oil on canvas)

(Oil on canvas)

(Oil on canvas)

(Acrylic on canvas)

 

point-shoot

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A group of young artists (I assume they're younger than my age), preparing the stage-wall.

The ManilArt'10 will run until the 1'st of August, at the SMX Convention Center (Mall of Asia).  Tickets are sold at 200Php.  Souvenirs like shirts, posters, umbrella, and ManilArt'10 catalogue are also being sold at the venue.  Believe me - the exhibit is more than your money's worth.  XD